Category: Awkward

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Fall Break? More Like Fall Test of Will…

Fall break. Break feels wrong. Fall trip? Fall travels? Fall test of will? That feels closer.  We made it. We are speeding up, I don’t want to sound braggy, but we knocked out a 5.5 hour trip in 7 hours, which by my calculations and my strong back bone in common core math, we basically arrived early.  It wasn’t all smooth sailing. Clara Jane asked if we were there yet about 6,000 times, including an unbelievably early query, as we...

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I Miss Cheese: The Perils of Getting Older

We are prepping for a garage sale. And have been moving things around in preparation for the biggest sale of the year. I am beat, I woke up feeling like I had been in a fender bender, followed by a heavy workout, followed by being the victim of a bear mauling. So, of course, that got me to thinking about how smoothly I am aging. When I get out of bed in the morning, my entire body sounds like I...

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Adam in Public – Checkout Line Awkward Run-in

It’s that time again, pull up a chair and put on your Snuggie, it’s time for another awkward run in… — Last December I went into my local super business store to buy large boxes for some orders I needed to ship. As I was checking out, the counter person and I had a glorious exchange. I could tell when I arrived at the desk I was dealing with a serious, no-nonsense operator just like me. Important: From here on...

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Summer Travel With Kids – The Long Ride Home

As summer comes to a close and the blazing 100-degree temps fade into the welcoming arms of the cool upper ninety-degree temps I think it’s time we address the elephant in the back seat. The long ride home with kids… It’s often mentioned that the ride home feels much shorter than the ride to vacation.  That’s fine and dandy and in most cases probably holds true.  But with kids in the back seat, the wheels can literally come off at...

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Filet of Fireworks: A Fourth of July Story

Here we are again, another quick spin around the sun and we are back to the Fourth of July(eve). Not only do I celebrate our countries independence I also celebrate the night I did not die in a head-on collision with a full grown cow. Wait, what? Yep, head-on. See the below equation for “clarity”: Me + Honda Accord + Dark and Hilly Road + Huge Cow – My Nerves = Craziness === Let me take you back…the year was 2012. I...

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Summer Travel With Kids – A Story Of What Not To Do

Summer travel with kids is not for the faint of heart. Anything can happen, lives will change, allegiances will be tested, and someone will get thrown up on, mark it down. It’s Murphy’s Law hopped up on Lucky Charms. My father-in-law always says it’s a vacation if you go without kids and it’s a trip if you go with kids… But this story from two summers ago, oh this story, I just got chills. It’s about a family of plucky...

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Things My Kids Do That I Can’t…

There are things that kids can get away with that the rest of us cannot. It’s not fair it’s not right, it’s downright selfish. I, for one, am jealous because of the things my kids can do that this “adult” cannot: 1. Touch their toes without bending their knees. They are like little gumbys. My hamstrings are so tight they sound like a car with bad brakes when I try to bend over. I’m like the tin man without his...

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Summer with Kids – The Heat is On

It’s that time of year, again. Summer with Kids… Winter’s cold grip held on too long and the five perfect days of spring seem to have slipped by in a moment. Now it’s hot and hotter most days and soon schools will shut their doors for a few months and the game is on. Summer camps, summer travel with kids, and hopefully without if you are able to get away, and a whole slew of other time killers to pass...

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Tornadoes, Earthquakes, and My Kids

It’s that time again! Storm season in Oklahoma. So, replace the batteries in the weather radio, grab a flashlight, and just in case get a hard hat because we do earthquakes in Oklahoma now, too.  Apparently, Tornadoes weren’t enough. I cleaned out the storm shelter tonight. I always plan to keep it clean through the winter, but I typically do it a day or two before we are supposed to get our first bad weather of the spring. Was it...

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I Was the Victim of a Crime, Sort of, Not Really, It’s Mostly True

So, weird stuff always happens to me. As an introvert, private rule follower, and overall quiet person you would think it would be just the opposite…a quiet life. It was high noon on a crisp fall day a couple of short years ago. I decided to drive through McDonald’s for a health drink (Large DDP) on my way back to the office. However, at the ripe old’ age of 32, I felt the urge to visit the little boy’s room....

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